Missed Connections in Ann Arbor, MI: Prince Charming Has Left The Kingdom

Note from the Missed Connections Chief Bottle Finder:

Ann Arbor, MI is a big college town and the happenings in and around the University of Michigan play a central role on the Ann Arbor MC. Today we feature a sampling of what you’ll find there…

Knight of Cups by r8r

Prince Charming Has Left the Kingdom

Missed Connections in Ann Arbor, MI

This gig is crap. Oh sure, the job description was positive enough:

* Rescue princesses from peril
* Break spells with just a kiss
* Act as PR spokesman for male gender
* Full benefits (medical, dental, vision) after 90 days
* Successful candidates will be proficient swordsmen, kissers, and equestrians

But when you get right down to it, what do I really do all day? Bluster and bluff my way through already-awkward social situations. Argue on behalf of the downtrodden — who turn out to be ungrateful bastards in the first place which is probably why they’ve got the lot they do. Lay my cloak in the mud for prissy, center-of-the-universe girls whose egos are surpassed only by their implants. Sure, once in a while I get to deliver a magic kiss to a genuinely sweet girl who just got caught up in a bad situation. But you know how often that really happens? And seriously, every time, every single time, she turns out to be underage, or already engaged prior to the spell being cast, or otherwise totally off-limits.

This job is crap and I’m leaving. Taking my faithful steed (the only GOOD part of the job, if you ask me — he never complains, and we have a simple oats-based relationship) and my sword and my armor, and going the hell home.

How about you?

Her Two Cents offers daily commentary on missed connections selected to appear on Lovelorn Poets.

Her Two Cents on Prince Charming Has Left the Kingdom

It appears our lovelorn Ann Arbor poet has been injured in the battle of romance one too many times and is taking refuge with his reliable stead. While I’d be the first to say that not all princesses are high maintenance Barbie dolls, I’d also recommend that if all you’re turning up in the dating-mating pool are evil step-sisters, then taking a break could be for the best. Perhaps riding out into the sunset with the horse and a frosty beverage (as illustrated so perfectly by r8r) is the cure for clarity.

Gentle Readers: What do you think about the saying, “sometimes you gotta kiss a lot of toads in order to find your prince”? Do you think our prince has had a string of bad luck with toady-girls or might there be another reason why he’s not meeting his princess?

Comments

the dude whisperer says

May 3, 2011 at 11:58 pm

There’s always another reason with dudes like this. Probably several. So angry. So very angry.
lovelornpoets says

May 5, 2011 at 8:45 am

Dude, I agree – as you often point out in your DW column, there are always two sides to the story (the dude, and the person who isn’t the dude). I’m a firm believer in the fact that if you find yourself in one lousy relationship after another there’s a reason for it. What’s that saying… “craziness is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results”?